Which buddhism is right for me

Once the mind is focused enough to look undistractedly into reality, we develop insight into the nature of our experience, which is marked by impermanence, suffering, nonego, and emptiness.

We naturally develop compassion for ourselves and all beings who suffer, and our insight allows us to help them skillfully. Finally, we experience ourselves and our world for what they have been since beginningless time, are right now, and always will be — nothing but enlightenment itself, great perfection in every way. In Buddhism, there is no savior. We have to face reality squarely, and we have to do it alone.

Not seeking protection is the only real protection. The good news is, we can do it. As human beings, we have the resources we need: intelligence, strength, loving hearts, and proven, effective methods. Because of that, we can rouse our confidence and renounce our depression and resentment. But while no one can do that for us, help and guidance is available.

There are teachers — women and men who are further along the path — who offer us instruction and inspiration. They prove to us it can be done.

Our fellow practitioners support our path, while never allowing us to use them as crutches. The Buddhist teachings offer us wisdom that goes back 2, years to the Buddha himself. We can go right to the source, because the lineage that started with Gautama Buddha is unbroken to this day. Buddhism definitely asserts there is a reality that is not material. Other religions say that too; the difference is that in Buddhism this spiritual reality is not God.

It is mind. Does my mind have characteristics, like thoughts, feelings, and identity, or is it the space within which these things arise? Does my mind change constantly or is it continuous? Is it one thing or many? Where is the boundary of my mind? Is it large or small? Is it inside me looking at the material world outside? Or are my perceptions and my experience of them both mind? The Dalai Lama has said that Buddhism must give up any belief that modern science disproves.

But it is easy to misinterpret this advice. Our modern egos are keen to take advantage of it. We have to test the teachings of Buddhism against our direct life experience, not against our opinions.

And while modern science can prove or disprove old beliefs about astronomy or human physiology, it cannot measure or test the nonmaterial. Buddhism values the rational mind and seeks not to contradict it in its own sphere. Finally, it is the rare person who can navigate the spiritual path alone. While retaining our self-respect and judgment, we must be willing to accept the guidance, even leadership, of those who are further along the path.

In a society that exalts the individual and questions the hierarchy of the teacher-student relationship, it is a challenge to find a middle way between too much self and not enough. Buddhism is not a one-path-fits-all religion. Beings are infinite.

So are their problems and states of mind. Buddhism offers a wealth of skillful means to meet their different needs. The problem is that things that feel helpful — like going along with our usual tricks — can sometimes make things worse.

So the Buddhist teachings are gentle, but they can also be tough. We need to face the ways we cause ourselves and others suffering. Buddhist meditators have been studying the mind for thousand of years. There are meditations to calm and focus the mind, contemplations to open the heart, and ways to bring ease and grace to the body. Today, people who want to explore Buddhism have many resources at their disposal. For the first time in history, all the schools and traditions of Buddhism are gathered in one place.

So, call first, or at least check the center's website for their beginner policies before you show up at the door. You may have friends urging you to join their dharma center and practice as they do.

That's great, but don't let yourself be pressured into joining something that doesn't feel right for you. It may be that the practice that works for your friend is all wrong for you. If you have to travel, look for a monastery or center offering beginner-level retreats with overnight accommodations. Often people resist becoming part of a Buddhist community. They read books about Buddhism, learn meditation from videos, and practice solo.

There's a problem with a purely solo practice, however. One of the foundational teachings of Buddhism is anatta , or not-self. The Buddha taught that what we think of as "I" is an illusion, and our dissatisfaction or unhappiness dukkha comes from clinging to that illusion. A stubborn refusal to practice with others is symptomatic of self-clinging. That said, many people find themselves practicing alone because they live far away from a temple or teacher.

If you can manage even one-weekend retreat a year, go. It can make all the difference. Also, some teachers are willing to work with long-distance students through email or Skype. Maybe there are many dharma centers in your area. Why not just sample the wisdom of all of them?

That's fine for awhile, as you explore and learn , but eventually, it's better to choose one practice and stick to it. With commitment, working through doubt and discouragement, we drill deeper and deeper into dharma and into ourselves. But the "sampler" approach is like digging 20 one-foot wells instead of one foot well. You don't get very far beneath the surface.

That said, it's not unusual for people to choose to change teachers or even traditions. You don't need anyone's permission to do that.

It's entirely up to you. There are Buddhist cults as well as phony teachers. People with little to no background in Buddhism have passed themselves off as lamas and Zen masters.

A legitimate teacher should be affiliated with an established Buddhist tradition, somehow, and others in that tradition should be able to verify the affiliation. The Buddha adapted his teachings to meet the needs of people with different personalities. If newcomers had a way to find the school that was best suited to them, perhaps they could find refuge instead of confusion and alienation.

Doing so requires familiarizing yourself with the various traditions, researching teachers and centers, and allowing yourself to experiment with different communities until you find one where you feel comfortable and supported. First, be honest with yourself about what your personality style is. To match your personality style with the appropriate Buddhist tradition and school, you need to familiarize yourself with the main ones, each of which has its own underlying philosophical and conceptual framework and practice modalities.

Vajrayana, for instance, is more nonconventional and commitment-based than, say, Theravada Buddhism. And each has its own religious and cultural underpinnings. Often a teacher may overemphasize these components, overshadowing the core philosophies and practices.

They may overlook introducing the four noble truths and eightfold noble path as the core teachings of the Buddha. Instead they might introduce you to the teachings of the founder of their particular school. Reading a book not just by a well known teacher but also by reputable scholars can help you get a good idea of not just the differences among the traditions and the schools within them but also about the core underlying teachings.

Though an emotional connection with a teacher is a critical factor, also consider if the teacher or their qualified assistant teachers have enough availability. Given the demands of Buddhist practice, a cohesive and supportive modern sangha is critical.

Remember that while the teacher is the central figure, the sangha is no less important.